As parents, we all have desires for our kids. Though those desires may vary, one desire that I’m sure ALL of us have is that of keeping our kids pure in mind and body.
I Timothy 5:22 “Keep thyself pure.” This is a clear Bible command. It is a standard that God holds his followers to in His Word.
We all desire to raise kids who are pure. However, the society and culture we live in today makes it very hard, and is pushing everything BUT purity at our children. Therefore, keeping our kids pure is a battle to fight purposefully, and not approach casually.
If there were a killer disease going around, which was highly contagious, we would do all we could to protect our children and family. We would protect them from places or things that might contaminate them with the germs of the disease. Keeping their immune system strong would be high on our priority list. We would take all the precautions we could to protect them.
We need to do the same thing spiritually. Realize that Satan is the killer, and little germs of sin weaken our conscience (immunity). Things that may seem small or unimportant will grow and fester, and Satan leads into impurity thru those seemingly “small” things like TV, music, wrong friends, impure habits, and impure thoughts.
As parents, we need to start EARLY protecting and preparing our children.
The most important thing to start with is WHY purity is important. Our kids and young people will be much more open to us in this area if we can explain the reason and importance of keeping pure.
Here are 3 points to share and discuss with our kids on WHY it’s important to keep yourself pure.
1. To receive God’s blessing vs. consequences of sin.
“A holy God made the universe in such a way that actions true to His character, and the laws derived from His character, are always rewarded. Actions that violate His character, however, are always punished. He rewards every act of justice; He punishes every act of injustice. We get to choose our own path, but with each path comes inevitable consequences.” –The Purity Principle
2. Our body belongs to Him.
“You are not your own, for you were bought with a price; therefore glorify God with your body.” I Cor. 6:19,20
When we become a Christian, we have been bought and paid for with the blood of Jesus. He has every right to tell us what to do with our mind and body. They belong to Him.
3. God sees everything.
“There is nothing covered that shall not be revealed; neither hid, that shall not be known. Luke 12:2
Often we are deceived by the devil’s lie that tells us, “It’s ok. No one is here to see. No one will ever know.”
We need to remind our kids of the truth of God’s Word – He sees everything.
What are some things we need to teach our kids from the time they are young to help them in the area of purity?
1. PHYSICAL PURITY IN RELATIONSHIPS
We need to start teaching our kids from a young age the importance of not touching/no physical contact with the opposite gender. Teach them that other than hugging and kissing their parents, they should save their hugs and kisses for the person they are going to marry. Those are privileges of marriage and reserved for your spouse.
“It is impossible to maintain a pure mind without maintaining a high standard of physical restraint. In USA Today – 85% of single 17 year-olds admitted to having already lost their purity. If Christian young people insist on following the dating standards of the world, then they will live with the results of those standards. On the other hand, 100% of young people who institute a personal no-touch rule and enfore it arrive at the marriage altar morally pure. 100%! – 7 Royal Laws of Courtship
2. EMOTIONAL PURITY IN RELATIONSHIPS
Parents should start planting little seeds when their kids are young.
For example, “A boyfriend/girlfriend relationship is a special relationship that God wants you to save for the one you marry.” As they get a little older, encourage them to be emotionally faithful to their future spouse by saving their emotions (heart) for that person.
“I saw that I had been involved in the dating scene for purely selfish reasons, without at all considering my future husband or my boyfriends’ future wives. By flirting and spending time with boys, and thus drawing their attention and affections to me, I was actually giving away something meant only for my husband. I had upheld a commitment to abstinence, but I had not understood true purity. I began to see that true purity was rooted in the heart; it meant that every thought, attitude, or emotion I allowed in must be honoring to my future husband and pleasing to God.” -Leslie Ludy
It is very important that you start teaching both aspects of purity in relationships when your kids are young. You want them to understand this before emotional attachments or physical involvement take place.
3. Purity in dress
We need to teach our daughters to dress modestly, so as not to cause young men to have impure thoughts.
“Parents need to screen their children’s clothing. Men are responsible to help their wives and daughters understand why this is so important.” – The Purity Principle
Along with this we need to teach our boys to turn their gaze away when they see inappropriate things. We taught our kids that they can’t always control what comes into their sight. They can, however, look away rather than continue to gaze, or look back at it again. (We called it the Law of The 2nd Glance)
4. Purity of Mind
We need to guard what goes into our children’s minds through their eyes and ears. The battle for purity is fought in our minds, and what we allow in through our senses. Images and words will be in our minds from what we see and hear.
Be aware of what your kids are watching on TV, what they are doing on the internet, and what they are reading. Set safeguards and boundaries, and give lots of instruction in this area.
Parents, the battle is real. It will take time and effort to teach your children, and monitor things, but protecting their purity is worth it! You must be purposeful in fighting this battle.