The Lord has blessed my husband and me with eight children. and we quickly found out that there are many myths about large families!
When the kids were younger, and we went places as a family, we would see heads turning as they mentally counted, “1,2,3...”
We also got lots of comments like, “Are they ALL yours?!”
Often people would say to me, “You must have a lot of patience.”
The truth is that I’ve run out of patience with those types of comments. The world looks at people with large families and says, “You’re crazy!” But God says children are a heritage and reward.
According to the Bible, children are a blessing or gift from the Lord. The world is telling us many things that just aren’t true about large families.
Here are some of the common myths about large families that I have heard:
1. You can’t afford to have a large family today.
The Bible tells us that God will supply all our needs.
Many times people who say this really mean they can’t have a large family AND the high standard of living they desire. God says, “And having food and raiment, let us be content.”
We found it was a huge blessing to see God supply our needs, and also to have to trust Him for those needs. Our kids have seen God supply, and have learned to trust Him as a result.
Maybe we couldn’t afford the best of everything, but we felt blessed to have eight gifts from the Lord.
2. My kids drive me crazy! I can’t get everything done!
Often the folks saying this are giving away the fact that they aren’t disciplining their children, and they are too busy with themselves!
Yes, my kids drive me crazy sometimes too, but I’ve found over the years that has usually been the case when I’m too busy doing what I want to get done, and I resent being bothered. Other times it’s because I’ve slacked off on discipline, and am not requiring instant obedience.
I always enjoyed going out to eat when the kids were younger. We got a log of stares due to our large group, but often as we were leaving, we heard comments like, “Your kids are so well behaved!”
People aren’t used to seeing kids that mind are pleasant to be around. Therefore, they believe several kids would drive you crazy!
As for, “How do you get everything done?“, the world looks at children and sees WORK. Yes, much work is involved. But, I see them as helpers!
If you train your kids to help, you are able to manage things easier, and they learn character. You’re also training them to work for the Lord!
3. I get so bored, and feel unfulfilled just being a mother.
I remember when a young lady from church told me that when she had children she planned to stay home with them, and quit working. In response to that, a friend had told her, “You’ll stay home for awhile, but then you’ll get bored!”
Well, that’s true IF you feel that raising kids isn’t serving God, and isn’t of eternal value. And yes, you may feel ‘unfulfilled” IF you expect to accomplish all your goals.
Here’s God’s answer. Get excited about molding and training Godly children!
What an opportunity and what a challenge! Do all you can to learn how to train your kids in God’s way.
Rather than being ‘bored”, you’ll find that you are growing as you look to God for help and wisdom, and as you die to self to meet the needs of those children.
All of these myths stem from the idea that children are a bother, not a blessing. As Christian parents may we replace that worldly attitude with the idea that what we’re doing is a Godly investment.
The Bible says we will reap what we sow. We are sowing to reap men and women who will be spiritual warriors and give their lives to serve God. What a blessed privilege!
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Thank you so much for this lesson. I’m from a large family. My husband and I were not able to have our own biological children but God helped our dreams come true by allowing us to adopt seven foster children. I think however you come by them they are definitely a blessing as God says. And we got the same strange looks and comments as you all did. I would just smile graciously and say thank you for your concern. Amen to all the comments.
Thank you so much for writing this! It’s a blessing having my sensational six!
I love the quote on your shirt! Great perspective.
Glad you enjoyed it Ashley! Congratulations on #4. 🙂
We had 3 kids in less than 3 years. I would push a double stroller with my oldest 2 while wearing my youngest at the stores by myself. The looks and comments I got–haha! And I only have 3!!! I always got and still do get the comment, “Your hands are FULL!” like they are a burden. It used to really hurt my feelings, because they are so precious to me. We lost our first baby and prayed for over 4 years to have another baby. So while some days may be challenging, they truly are blessings! So my friend had a shirt made for me that said, “My hands are not as full as my heart.”
I love this ❤️. I have three kids now and am planning for #4. You can imagine all the comments I get when I even mention the fourth. God bless ALL OF YOU who are taking the time to raise your children Gods way, to love this world and each other!
Thanks for your encouraging words. Love your response to that comment! 🙂
Your points are right on. We have 5 children our oldest is 20 youngest is 15 months. My bride chooses to be home and to homeschool and we run a farm. From discipline to how to afford them you are so very correct. When we found we were pregnant on our last someone said”you know there s a way to stop that?” My response was “yes there is but its not up to me!” God chooses how full your quiver will be NOt I>
Thank You
Thanks Diana! Glad you liked it. 🙂
I loved this post! Thank you!!
Sad that many people can’t understand why you would WANT to have more, on purpose! But as Christians, we know that children are a blessing.
We have 10 kids. I tend not to get the large family comments any more now that we’ve started adopting. People have finally figured out that it’s not that we’re not smart enough to master birth control; we’re actually doing this on purpose!
Haley, this made me laugh! I can picture the expressions, as we got them often! It’s good you have learned to be amused by it. 🙂
As I am one of 11 kids, I can totally relate! Over the years, as we have added more children and gotten bigger we always resemble a parade when we all leave the house. The expressions and comments on other people’s faces are priceless and hysterical! We’ve learned to laugh them off and are even quite amused. It’s difficult being different, especially when it’s that noticeable, but it does come with its perks. 😉
~Haley
Congratulations on your pregnancy! 🙂
Thank you for sharing this! We have 4 children and I’m surprised at the comments we get sometimes. I am expecting child #5 this summer and dreading how many more comments we are going to get when we go out as a family.