In my last post, Why You Need To Win The Hearts Of Your Children, we shared the importance of winning their hearts, and four ways you can do that. Today we will look at 4 more simple ways you can win your child’s heart.
5. Talk to them, and listen when they talk to you.
Nothing says “I love you and care about you” more than listening and showing an interest in what is important to them. We are busy, and it’s easy to hurry from cleaning to cooking to laundry, and not want to stop and really give them our attention. But we need to choose to stop what we’re doing, look at them, and listen.
I have found that when there is a lady at church who I feel doesn’t like me, or isn’t real friendly with me, the key is to find what she is interested in, and ask her about it. I did this with one lady by asking her about her grandchildren. My goodness, she opened up and talked like we were best of friends. This works with our kids too!
6. Be crazy and fun, so they want to be with you.
The crazy part just kind of happened to me somewhere after the fourth child. 🙂 After that, I had to start working on being FUN. It’s easy to get your mind focused on all the work to do, that one child you’re concerned about, the bills, etc. As a result, you forget to laugh and have fun. No one wants to be around someone who is irritable and stressed.
How can we expect our children to want a relationship with us when we push them away with disapproval or anger because of our mood, or our stress? They will start to avoid you, or trying to read your mood to see if it is a good time to try to talk to you, or if it would be better to stay away. It’s easy to get snippy, and easily frustrated if we aren’t careful. Make it a goal to try to laugh and do something fun or silly with your kids everyday. Laughing and having fun together forms a bond.
7. Don’t be too proud to apologize when you need to.
If you have been snippy, or angry with them, as soon as you realize it, go back and apologize. Admit it – even though we are the parents, sometimes we are WRONG. It’s easy to over-react, get frustrated easily, and jump to conclusions. Fortunately, kids are very forgiving, and willing to accept our apologies. If however, we treat them wrong repeatedly, and don’t make it right, it will cause them to harbor hurt and bitterness, and that in turn will close their hearts to us.
8. Pray for wisdom to know their heart, to reach it, win it, and keep it!
With each child you may do things a little differently, based on their personality. It would be MUCH easier if each child was the same, so once you figured it out, you’d be good to go! 🙂 But God, in His wisdom, made each of our children different to keep us depending on Him.
We need to daily ask God to guide us, and help us to do what we need to do in order to win and KEEP the hearts of our children!